Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Why Can't I Socialize!!!

I have found college life to pretty lonely outside the classroom setting. I just can't seem to be able to speak to anyone. I feel like an impostor here. How the hell did I get in here? What the heck am I doing here?! I am still surprised that I got accepted here. It boggles my mind that a school that is in the ranks of like Juliard would let a little loser nobody in like me. Not joining Marching Band was definitely the worst decision I have made. It has thrown me out of the social loop with all the music freshman. What Possessed me not to join. I love marching band with a passion! What the heck is wrong with me?! I feel like the new kid that has moved in halfway through the school year.  It has put all the social progression that I had made within the last four cease to exist.  I used to be able to talk to anybody and get along fine. Nowadays, I find it hard to find words to start a conversation. I believe I have reverted back to being that person that would help you with anything. A door mat.
It has become time for me t get a backbone and confidence but the thing is I have no idea how to go about and do it. So in mean time I will turn to you my dear friend the internet to get these thoughts out of my head and to motivate me into actually socializing. But the chances of that are slim... So I will be back soon with more tales of my lonely woe and/or/maybe the awesome geek thing that keep me alive for the moment.

Mack G

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